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TIME OUT FOR “TIME-OUT”
Written
by: The National Association for the Education of Young
Children
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The
purpose of discipline for young children is to teach coping skills
and discourage inappropriate behavior.“Time-out” is
not a first choice, but a last resort technique for a child who
is harming another or in danger of harming herself. Used infrequently
and for very brief periods (no longer than two or three minutes),
time-out may give a child the opportunity to calm down and cool
off after a frustrating situation. Used often or inappropriately,
time-out may not only be ineffectual—it may be damaging to
the child.
The early years are a time for children to develop confidence
and self-control. When adults create environments that respect
each individual child, they set forth a message that the world
is a warm, friendly learning place. Positive discipline techniques
that combine caring and direction are a part of this healthy environment.
Adults should look for meaningful ways to show children why harmful
and aggressive acts are unacceptable.
Before
you give a child time-out, make sure of the following:
•
Adults avoid using time-out for infants and toddlers.
Very young children should not be isolated, nor should they
be ignored or left
without proper stimulation. Infants or young toddlers who do not
understand why their behavior is unacceptable should gently be
directed to more acceptable
behaviors or activities.
• Your expectations of a child’s behavior are realistic.
A generalknowledge of child development will help you identify
when children are merely experimenting with their boundaries and
when they are behaving inappropriately. When adults give children
realistic goals, children feel good about themselves and are more
likely to cope successfully with stressful situations.
• Consequences immediately follow the child’s behavior.
When children experience immediate repercussions for harming
others, they understand more clearly why we are disciplining them.
Whenever possible, adults should offer children positive alternatives
to their actions (asking a child to help rebuild a block structure
she has knocked down is more productive than removing her from
the area
entirely)
• Time-out should not be humiliating, nor should it make
children
feel threatened or afraid. There should not be a special chair
or area assigned for time-out—this reinforces the idea that
time-out is a punishment and may cause undue anxiety. Adults should
never make a child feel ridiculed or isolated during time-out
periods.
• The child should not be left alone, unless he wants to
be.
Young children need adults’ support to work out their
feelings. If adults show children that their feelings count, they
will be more likely to respect the feelings of others. A caregiver
should always visually observe a child during a time-out period.
Time out does not last longer than it takes for the child to calm
down. After the child calms down, explain clearly what is appropriate
and inappropriate behavior. There should be no ambiguity about
why we have disciplined the child, otherwise the child is more
likely to repeat the undesirable behavior.
• The child feels safe with the knowledge that people care
for her. Remember
that children imitate adults’ behavior. Screaming, hitting,
or ridiculing a child for bad behavior is not an effective way
to teach self-control.
• Tailor the method of discipline to the individual child.
Children develop their abilities to control themselves at
different rates. Take into consideration the needs of the particular
child involved. No single technique will work with every child
every time.
• Time-out is not used as a punishment.
Time-out is an opportunity for a child to clear her mind and
rejoin the group or activity in a more productive state. Teach
a child how to solve her own problems with love and support, and
time-out may no longer be necessary.
Written by: The NATIONAL ASSOCIATION for the EDUCATION of YOUNG
CHILDREN
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